This Government has been De-patilled for your safety. On careful review and reflection, the Powers That Be have determined that the main reason for the horrific incidents of 26th November and the 60 hours that followed, have been several Patils.
Two of these, Shivraj (according to an intrepid investigative journalist, a mole for a Large Foreign Organization named Brylcreem) and R.R. (the nemesis of a major evil in this world, bar girls) have been unceremoniously asked to go by the Powers That Be, while the third, Pratibha, has been spared owing to the fact that as President, she has no decision making powers other than buying curtains for the Rashtrapati Bhavan.
The Powers That Be have determined that now that the government has been De-patilled for your safety, life can go on as before. It is not necessary to upset established administrative procedure by implementing the many hare-brained suggestions coming out of the irresponsible blogosphere, such as making the police more independent, or upgrading their armory, their salaries and their accountability. The Powers That Be have better things to do with their time.
In other news, Barkha Dutt is being nominated for the Pulitzer Prize for coining the phrase "India's 9/11".